Thursday, 27 September 2012

My Top 10 : Most Annoying Video Game Characters


      Kaepora Gaebora - The Legend of Zelda : Ocarina of Time

Kaepora Gaebora... The owl from Ocarina of Time and other 'Zelda' games. Now its not the fact that this annoying bird decides to suddenly interrupt you on your travels, nor is it his annoying music, no its the information that he gives you. 
For some reason (most likely to annoy people who sit there skipping through the dialogue) at the end of his 'wisdom' he asks "Would you like to hear that again" but they put options in the wrong order, 'yes' is first, then 'no' so when you are trying to skip through his dialogue you almost always end up selecting the option to hear it again. Sometimes he'll even ask "did you get that?" and the options will be reversed again so 'no' will then be the first option so you end up hearing it all again!

Skyrim Guard - The Elder Scrolls : Skyrim

The first mention of guards on this list is the town guard from TES V: Skyrim. I felt that this guard deserved a place in the top 10 by himself and its all down to that one little line of dialogue - "I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee". That one line soon took the internet by storm, suddenly there was hundreds of memes, spoof videos and photos of people who had tattoos of arrows on their knees, at first it was funny, and some great pictures came out of it, but then it became the new 'the cake is a lie' meme and was overused and eventually hated by everyone.

Oddjob - Goldeneye 007

Anyone who has played Goldeneye 007 will instantly know why Oddjob is here.  So your sitting there with 3 of your best friends, you load up Goldeneye, pick your map and weapons and then you get to the character selection screen, then either one of two situations usually play out, either everyone rushes to pick Oddjob and once someone has got to him first everyone sighs and tells them they are a cheat or there's the one person who always goes for Oddjob and everyone moans and groans and tells them they are a cheat when they pick him.
Oddjob is considered such a cheat due to the fact that he is much shorter than the other characters, making it difficult for anyone else (especially Jaws) to shoot him, resulting in the cheat player running around shooting everyones knee caps out. 
Having recently played the PS3 re-release of Goldeneye 007 you can be sure that after all these years Oddjob is always the hot topic of discussion and name calling.

Natalya - Goldeneye 007

Next on the list is another entry from Goldeneye 007, this time it is from the single player storyline. Natalya... Yeah, that woman..
You are given the pleasure of escorting this lovely lady through Bunker 2 and what does she do in return for you trying to save her life? She runs into every bullet she can find, seriously, like a moth to a flame. Well I say 'run' she actually walks very very slowly, so even if you leave her in her cell and you run off to kill all the guards first you still have to stop and wait for her every 5 seconds whilst she wanders around aimlessly wondering where all the guys with all their shiny bullets have gone, to make things more annoying she then runs much faster than you in the cut scene at the end leaving you behind while she saves herself. 

Toad - Super Mario Bros

"Thankyou Mario! But our princess is in another castle" - This is Toad's famous line from Super Mario Bros. 
Picture the scene, you've fought your way through your first castle, you've been burnt by lava, had rotating fire sticks scorch your coin purse as you jump over them and you've had some ugly old dinosaur at the end spit fire at you, but you did it, you step up to get the well earned kiss from the princess you've just saved but wait, no princess? Just a little round headed git telling you you're in the wrong bloody castle! What the hell was that ugly-saur spitting fire at you for if there was no princess in there to save? And that takes me onto the next character...

Princess Peach - The entire 'Mario Bros' series 

...Yes that's right, Princess Peach. You'd think after being kidnapped for the countless times that she has she'd have tightened security by now, unless of course she ... likes being kidnapped? What could be better than have 2 guys fight over you, risking life and limb to give you all the attention you want. We've all seen the 'behind the scenes' pictures of Peach and Bowser laughing at Mario looking in the wrong castles while they have a bit of fun waiting for him... what a manipulative bitch... 

Suicider Zombies - Dead Island

I'm sure there are far more annoying zombies later on in dead island but just recently I came across the Suicider zombie. Its very distinct with its huge pulsating boils and its creepy "help me" cries. After its first appearance in the quest 'black hawk down' they start to appear everywhere in the most awkward of places. Two seconds after you come in contact with them they explode and kill you instantly if you are too close. Two seconds is a very short time if you turn a corner to find one standing in your way or you open a door and its standing right infront of you.

Baby Mario - Super Mario Land 2 : Yoshi's Island

What were they thinking when they made this game, really? Lets make this cute little baby Mario and put Yoshi in charge of him, but you know what, if Yoshi drops him lets protect baby Mario in a bubble where he can sit there and cry....and cry some more...wailing...screaming...over and over until you pick him up again...and then drop him again 5 seconds later..

Navi - The Legend of Zelda : Ocarina of Time

Hey! Listen! Hey! Hey! Hey! Look! Hey! Listen! 
Yes OK I get that you want me to look at that rock and yes I know you want to tell me something I already know but if I didn't respond to you the first hundred times I'm not going to now you annoying floating fuzzball.

Dog - Duck Hunt

If you grew up playing Duck Hunt you'll understand why I've put the dog at number 1 ...You could shoot down a string of ducks with awesome skill  (without cheating by placing the gun against the screen) but you miss one little duck and that bastard would pop up out of the grass and laugh at you, a real annoying little snigger, the kind of laugh that gives you the urge to take your light gun and violently shoot at that git until there's dog brain all over the field. If there was one character that I had to choose from this list to put in the next Smash Bros game it would have to be this guy.

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